Reflections Thus Far

Holy cow, it's August! Time flies when you are having...well maybe it just flies. April 22nd is when we came to Philadelphia just to have a consultation. Little did we know the crazy events that would follow. We came just to make sure that we could do Fetal Surgery just in case it was needed. On April 26th it was needed.

It's hard to process everything that has happened so far. Kate and I still talk about how this is so surreal. This happens to those people on "A Baby Story" on TLC. It doesn't happen to us..well apparently it does. For some reason God chose us to be in this situation in this moment in time. Here's a few of my observations on the whole process.

#1  God is good. And He is not just good because He answered our prayers. I know that it is obviously easier for me to say "God is good" considering we still have a healthy and happy Haddie in room 94 of CHOP. But I would like to think that I could still say that "God is good" even if He chose to take our daughter. Because it is true. I know that He doesn't want death and destruction and disease. He never wanted that. But man chose to sin and this world got screwed up. Death, pain, and teratomas came into the picture. But He has still brought good things into the world and He chooses to intervene sometimes. Sometimes, for whatever reason, He does not. So we thank Him for doing it this time for us because He didn't have to.

#2 We aren't really that strong or special. People tell us often that they don't know how we do it or how we have kept such a positive attitude. We don't really feel that special. We really didnt have any options in all of this. Haddie had to have the surgery. So we dealt with it. She had to be born premature. So we dealt with it. We had to live away from home for a few months. So we've dealt with it. We may look like we are strong but I assure you that we are not. We both have broken down, gotten depressed, and became angry many times. Some moments we just hung on. We have relied on prayers, cards, and friends during all of this.

The only thing that would make us special is Christ. We are Christians and have hope of eternity. So we knew no matter what, Haddie would be okay. I have no idea how people without hope of heaven can make it through this. We have a peace that I don't think some of the people at CHOP have. And I'd like to take credit for that...but I can't. It's from God and God alone.

#3 God uses little things for His glory. I know that some of you that read this may not be Christians or may not pray a lot. But you have talked to God on behalf of a little girl...and God has received glory. Some doctors and nurses have seen our faith, doubted that little girls chances, and have seen God's glory. And in my own heart I've had my own doubts and worries...yet I've just tried my best to trust Him. And every day I see that precious child, I see His glory. God has used a 2lb 7oz little girl to change some lives for His glory. And that just pumps me up.

So that's just a few of the things I've been thinking about. We ask that you continue to pray...especially tomorrow as Haddie has surgery to remove what's left of the teratoma. We are so ready to go home. Apparently the Lord thinks I need to learn some more patience :)    Hope you all have a great weekend and thanks for joining us on this crazy journey called life.

O, and if you aren't a Christian and don't know about the hope we have, please feel free to ask us about it. We would love to tell you an awesome story about a man named Jesus.